'Update: The HOA found this post': Petty HOA emails resident about birthday party, apologizes after homeowner shares their email with 6,000+ people online

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Aug 16, 2025 11:00 AM EDT

These HOA members made fools of themselves, but they didn't realize how their words sounded until it was too late. 

The internet is forever! Most of us have been taught that since we first started surfing the web, because it's a very important lesson. Any selfie you post, any TikTok you and your friends think up, and any comments or posts will all live on forever. You may think that you're just some random person — who would ever bother to keep your information on the internet? But there are plenty of archives and automatic scrapers that'll ensure your words and images will live on forever, whether you want them to or not.

I suppose the bigger lesson here is also that anything you put into writing will also have staying power. Whether it's an email, text, or even a written note, that thing is going to last forever. This HOA is realizing that while their faces turn bright red — because they didn't realize how cringy their email to a resident sounded until tons of folks from the internet reflected it back at them. 

To the HOA's credit, there aren't many HOA organizations that would backpedal on their original message like this. You can check out the ridiculous first message and apologetic second one down below and see for yourself. 

Next, read about the 16-year-old who quit his job so he could stop shelling out money for his 10, 8, 7, and 5-year-old siblings: '[My parents] told me I should understand life isn't always equal.'

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10542952704
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+
  • 02
    iЯ Concerning Event During Your Recent Birthday Party Inbox 8:33 am g to me Dear I hope you're doing well. I wanted to reach out regarding an incident that occurred over the weekend during your birthday party. A few of us in the community couldn't help but notice the arrival of three blacked-out SUVs, which quite frankly, startled and unsettled several of your neighbors.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 03
    It's really concerning to see such vehicles showing up in our otherwise peaceful, family-oriented neighborhood, especially without any prior notice. As you can imagine, the sight of them raised a lot of questions and caused quite a bit of anxiety. Some residents even thought something more serious was happening. The whole situation was, quite honestly, alarming, and we had no idea how to react.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 04
    We all understand celebrating special occasions, but in the future, we would appreciate it if you could let us know in advance about any unusual activity. It would certainly help ease the collective nerves of your neighbors, who were left feeling quite uncomfortable by the presence of those vehicles.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 05
    Please let us know if there's anything you can do to avoid similar concerns going forward. We trust you'll be considerate of the community's feelings moving forward. Best regards, ↑ HOA Vice President Ugh. Reply ↑ Very well said. Forward
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 06
    Man and woman lay on white couch wearing party attire surrounded by gold, purple, white, and black balloons and streamers on the floor
    via Curated Lifestyle For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 07
    The email I just received from HOA. The people in the SUV were regular people who were my friends. This is just weird. Am I supposed to tell those people to rent a Prius the next time around?
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 08
    FYI this was a very tame party. No loud music. About 6 vehicles in the driveway and 2 on the street and everyone parked in a decent manner.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly

    The HOA is being totally ridiculous about this! Why should residents ever have to notify their HOA about a simple house party? 

  • 09
    [deleted] You got to milk this. So many good ideas in the comments. Please update us.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 10
    FamiliarAnt4043 Tell them that security protocols prohibit you from advising them prior to having these friends visit. Then, give them the phone number of the nearest Secret Service office and tell them to call if they have any questions. Think of the fun to be had.
    via u/FamiliarAnt4043
  • 11
    Moetheoneandonly OP Update: The HOA found this post. Im just going home now and will post the updated email follow up they sent me. I think they got the message. So far 4000+ people commented.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 12

    Here's the apology from that HOA, who seem incredibly embarrassed

    Dear I'm reaching out after one of our HOA members brought to my attention the Reddit post about the email I sent regarding your birthday party. After reviewing the post and seeing the overwhelming response, I can completely understand why my original message was seen as alarmist, demeaning, and even offensive. I want to publicly apologize to you and anyone else who felt the same. That was never the intention, and I deeply regret how the email was worded.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 13
    The feedback highlighting how my email was seen as inappropriate and offensive is completely understandable, and I sincerely apologize for that. Our community strives to be inclusive and welcoming, and I recognize that my message did not reflect those values.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 14
    I also ask, in the interest of privacy, that you kindly refrain from revealing any personal information about our HOA members in your Reddit post, as that could lead to significant privacy issues for individuals in our community. We want to handle this situation responsibly and avoid any further complications. Moving forward, we are committed to fostering a respectful and inclusive neighborhood, and I appreciate your understanding as we work to make this right. Best regards,
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 15
    Moetheoneandonly OP My response to my HOA: It's hard to believe you'd be this cooperative and apologetic without the 6,000 Redditors who weighed in. Let this serve as a clear message to you and any other HOA "leaders" stop with the nonsense. If even 1/100th of the people commenting here knew who you insufferable folks are, they'd troll you endlessly and make your so called inclusive and welcoming neighborhoods a nightmare. Sincerely, A friend of the black SUV owners.
    via u/Moetheoneandonly
  • 16
    badpeach LOL your HOA is s ing themselves right now. They thought they could quietly bu y you, like they do everyone else in the neighborhood. The original person that e-mailed you is currently crying fetal position, thinking about how they are about to be removed as president. You know sending out these insane e-mails, harassing the neighborhood, & spying on everyone is the only thing they are living for. What are they going to do now instead? They'll have to get a hobby
    via u/badpeach

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